I really have nothing to add.
I really have nothing to add.
Being the serious blogger that I am, I feel the world is missing out if I don’t offer up my two cents’ worth on the phenomenon of Donald Trump. Hang in there.
Here’s a pretty picture while you wait.
Recently turned hawkish president Barack Obama grabbed his newly discovered sack yesterday and ordered a full on attack on Bashar al-Assad’s armed forces in an attempt to put an end to Syria’s bloody civil war.
Patriot missiles were launched from US warships in the Mediterranean leaving the Presidential Palace in Damascus (aka Syria’s White House) a smoldering ruin. The dictator’s whereabouts, or even if he is alive, is unknown at this point, a spokesman from the Pentagon reportedly said.
Simultaneous air strikes where carried out against all known depots of chemical weapons, fingers crossed and hoping that the raids won’t disperse the chemicals and make a bad situation even worse. The good news is that in such an eventuality no US pants will be on the ground and local civilians will just have to tough it out.
American fighter planes in a coordinated attack.also effectively grounded the Syrian air force in a massive strike taking out more than 90% of the dictator’s war planes.
In a speech just a few minutes ago President Obama said that America’s actions were legally and morally justified since the “international norm” post World War II is that you can’t carry out mass killings of a civilian population. This norm was established after the US targeted two large cities in Japan and dropped the only atomic bombs to ever be used in wartime on hundreds of thousands of designated civilian Japs. Less a crime of war, it was considered by American top brass, politicians and scientists as a lab experiment. A successful lab experiment; who’s gonna dare fuck with us now? Historians have long since vindicated Harry Truman. The legal council in the White House is in the process of drawing up a whitepaper legitimizing the president’s actions. He added that we will be greeted as liberators.
Both Russia and China have condemned the United States’ unilateral action in the UN and say that America has brought the entire region to the brink of a conflagration that may be impossible to put out. Iran’s president Hassan Rouhani says the Zionists in Washington have gone too far this time. The Iranian military has been mobilized and there are unconfirmed reports of nuclear missiles being aimed at Israel to “wipe the Zionist dogs off the map once and for all” coming from unnamed Iranian sources close to the clerical rulers. The American ambassador to the UN countered with a statement that America will take “all and every necessary precautions” to stop Iranian aggression. He finished his statement by saying “the US doesn’t need anybody’s stinking permission to do the whatever she wants”.
The long and arduous process of rebuilding Syria to a functioning democracy based on American principles of freedom and liberty will begin once the dust settles, Obama added, saying that thousands of US troops must be committed to the task possibly lasting over a decade or more, and billions of dollars will have to be spent. Using executive privilege he declared all civilian contracts non-bid and gave them to Halliburton and Blackwater who immediately subcontracted them to friends and family. He did not speculate as to the exact amount, but said the money presses at the Federal Reserve are in the process of being upgraded and overhauled, plans for quantitative easing on an unprecedented scale are being finalized and you can pretty much kiss any hopes of tax relief goodbye.
This is a breaking story and we will update as it develops. Not a word of it is true. Yet. Sit tight and don’t switch channels as I shake my magic snow globe.
A half hour ago EST Israel launched a pre-emptive nuclear strike against Iran’s capital city of Tehran.
Within minutes the Israeli launch was detected and Iran retaliated with a nuclear attack on Tel Aviv. Based on the half-life of weapons-grade Uranium, Israeli beaches in the area will be inaccessible for quite some time.
A guy down the road from where I live, on condition that we preserve his anonymity, commented hastily that America now seems to be caught between a rock and a really, fucking hard place, as he rushed to the store to buy ammo, beef jerky, bottled water and iodine tablets.
The Pope has declared that God has deemed that the situation in the Middle-East qualifies as the Rapture. If you are reading this message you are not one of the chosen. The Pope himself was also left behind and was later found having committed apparent suicide by hanging himself from the shower curtain rod in the papal bathroom while performing an act of auto-erotic asphyxiation.
The Antichrist is having a field day with us who are left behind. Earlier predictions that the boogey man would be Obama turned out to be inaccurate. The real Angel Of Darkness is now confirmed to be Donald Trump, as all signage on his properties abruptly changed from TRUMP to 666. Hell will be watching reruns of The Apprentice for all eternity
I just set up ogndy.wordpress.com as a feder blog for OGNDY.com. I thought my introductory post was funny, so I’m re-posting it here.
This is just an introductory post to let everyone know about my REAL blog, OGNDY.com – The Truth About Everything. I’ll be posting the occasional teaser post here on my WordPress blog, but the sole reason for ogndy.wordpress.com is to be a feeder for the REAL thing. So go ahead and bookmark OGNDY.com right away; you know you will sooner or later.
The following is just some random text to get the spiders started. My apologies if you feel you were lured here by false pretense. A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. Thanks for your time.
Obama sex scandal: Michelle Obama’s secret life as a dominatrix revealed. Donald Trump commits suicide (hallelujah!)? The ACLU goes public – registers with NYSE for their IPO. All Guatanamo Bay detainees to be given amnesty according to anonymous White House source close to the president. The Supreme Court overturns Roe v Wade. Effective immediately abortion is a federal crime. Newt Gingrich withdraws from GOP race, endorses Christine O’Donnell. Michele Bachmann confirmed HIV positive. Marcus Bachmann to wed Chaz Bono. Oral Roberts University to offer degree in oral sex. Evangelical Christianity declared the state religion in historic amendment to the constitution. Clint Eastwood abducted by aliens. Elvis confirmed alive and well. Charles Manson escapes from jail, goes on killing rampage. Pakistan nukes American bases in Afghanistan. Alabama, Mississippi and Georgia secede from Union, reinstate slavery. Rick Perry tarred and feathered by mad atheists. God declared dead: scientists claim to have found His remains in orbit around Jupiter. Satan suspected to be behind divine killing. Jesus has returned to appear on Oprah, says it was all a joke. Mel Gibson goes to Jewish hell. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad defects to the US, seeks Burger King franchise. Israel announces nuclear Armageddon to commence in the middle east come passover 2012, citing being sick and tired of the never-ending squabble with the Palestinians. Marijuana decriminalized in surprise bill from Congress. President declares world peace. Cuba to become 51st American state.