Husband Cat vs. Wife Cat

This is my (the Husband’s) cat, Gule (Norwegian for “yellow”), dutifully and intrepidly, without concern for his own safety, guarding our property against intruders. Is he a hero? That’s not for me to say. Is he the most handsomest cat in the tri-state area? Well, we do get emails from neighbors saying their female felines are quite smitten by him. He has been observed chasing large dogs and wolverines off the property.

Gule the very handsome cat.

Gule the very handsome and valiant cat of the husband.

This is my wife’s cat, Fuffu, a cowardly, mean-spirited fatass, lying on the floor waiting to be fed. I tried to get him to stand up and pose for the photograph, but he’s too lazy, and besides, his legs would probably break under his enormous weight. He has been known to run to his mommy crying because the mice taunt him. He’s also afraid of squirrels. All he does is eat and brown-nose.

Fat gray domestic short haired cat

My wife’s cat, Fuffu the fat coward.

Stupid Cat!

Recently my cat has been sleeping in a small, nylon gym bag that was laying around on the floor. So I thought I’d cozy it up a bit for him and put a nice, fuzzy and warm fleece in it. Now he looks at the bag, looks at me and I can tell he’s thinking “why the fuck did you do that?” and walks away to sleep in some other uncomfortable place. The moral of the story is if it ain’t broke, you’ll never understand cat logic

Dingo The Cat

Dingo enjoying the heat from my computer’s backup battery. He also enjoys cat food, napping, and gazing blankly into the void. His goals are to attain world dominance, kill as many moles as possible, and chase Lupi (his arch enemy, a black, female American short-haired) off the property.

Edit 02-03-2012 @ 11:15PM: Yes, the pink-capped bottle on the desk is in fact MiraLAX®.